I Dare To Hope

Today my mom started a kemo-like IV therapy for her blood disease. In 1986 she started receiving blood transfusions and has been getting them ever since. After 23 years of transfusions, it has really started to take a toll on her body. Lately she has been going to get blood every 9 days, and she is still tired. Whenever I drive past the hospital my kids say, "There is Grandmas hospital."

Unlike Kemo, this therapy is not as hard on the body, she will not loose her hair, the most common side effect is fatigue. I don't know how she could be more tired. Just walking from her bedroom to the living room makes her break out in a sweat. I don't think people understand how tired she really is. Sleeping doesn't help.

Anyway, this medicine, if it does what it should/can, is supposed to help her bone marrow produce proper red blood cells. The medicine does not kill the cell like kemo, it kicks them into gear. The doctor said there was a 40% chance that it will work. It is not a great percentage, but it is something. If it works it should make her transfusion less often or maybe none at all. It takes about 3-4 months to see if it is working. She goes in once a day, for an hour, for 5 days then nothing for 3 weeks, then once a day for 5 days and so on.

So, I am hopeful. If it will make her feel a little better, that is enough for me. She has already lived longer than I thought she ever would. It is hard to see her tired and ageing and not be able to do anything to help. I do not expect a miracle, because I trust in the Lord and his plan. But if He wants her to stay with us a little longer, that is alright with me.